Tenacious Twenties

I'm living my life and figuring things out along the way. I'm here to share my thoughts, ideas, and adventures.

Gifts.

Well, here I am lounging at home, thinking, and sipping on some cranberry juice on-the-rocks. I have a little grin on my face and my heart feels happy. It’s still really hot even though it’s September but hey, it’s Southern California. I just got off the phone with my grandmother who lives in Argentina and we spent the last ten minutes of the phone conversation sending each other hugs and kisses. I love her. I also got a call from a friend I hadn’t spoken to in a long time who lives abroad and a call from a friend who I hear from daily who lives ten minutes away. I got a hug from that aunt whose not really an aunt but I call her aunt, who visited today. And I got smiles from strangers and a “How’s your day?” from the cashier at trader Joes where I got my cranberry juice. And most meaningful of all, I got a hug from my dad, who hugged me with his stroke-affected hand.

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Wild; By Cheryl Strayed

This book was given to me to by my beautician because I had commented to her that books were giving me a much-needed depart from my real life. And Cheryl Strayed’ book ended up being that and so much more. Her writing has an ease to it and a fluidity to it that allows for a quick and heartfelt read. It’s the story about a young twentysomething woman who is going through some big life challenges when she decides to backpack thousands of miles by herself. The book chronicles not only her challenges on the trail but also her internal turmoil that she works through, while hiking on her own.

This book was exactly what I needed when I needed it. Furthermore, it has really inspired me to want to travel on my own, something that I have always felt hesitation about doing.

Read this book if:

  • you’re going through a rough patch in life
  • you are in need inspiration
  • like traveling and adventures

1-2-3

After spending a couple weeks indoors, helping out with my father’s recovery I started to get a bad case of cabin fever. I started feeling depressed and lost because I was totally 100% consumed by my father’s situation. I wasn’t socializing with anyone or doing anything for me. I wasn’t having any fun. And all I was thinking about what my dad was doing, what he wasn’t doing, what he was eating, pooping,saying,etc… But like with all life challenges, eventually there is a point when bad shit stops happening. The Universe has a way of evening things out.

My dad started getting better. He started becoming more independent. My stepmother took a month off from work to look after him and his recovery took a huge leap of improvement. My step mom would watch him during the day and I would do physical therapy with him during the evenings. Improving day by day (and still improving). I even would catch him occasionally laughing and smiling. It was a great feeling.

It started to be okay for me to go out and live my life. And let me tell you, that is EXACTLY what I did…except to the extreme.

Last week, I went out three nights in a row. And all three nights, I felt like a firecracker. (I can’t believe I called myself that, but it just happened.) I felt like I was on fire. In other words, I felt like wherever I was there was a spotlight on me and a strategically placed fan seductively blowing my hair in the wind. I just felt happy to be out, knowing my father was alive and well.

Night One:

I felt like every drink, every conversation and every laugh was the best I had ever had in my life. I felt happy excited jubilant to be out, socializing with others. I went with two good friends, and their friend, who by the end of the night was my friend and massaging my feet.

Night Two:

I went out with my sister to celebrate my university officially recognizing that I had graduated with my master’s degree. My sister is the type of person who you go out with and there is instantly 10 guys lined up to talk to her. She is a hoot and fun all-the-time. She’s one of the only people I know who likes to dance as much I like to dance. So we went out. I may or may have not made out with a total stranger that night and walked away with three phone numbers of men who are bad ideas. Hadn’t had a night like that in looooong time.

Night Three:

Two of my really good friends had birthdays, which I had promised to attend. Knowing I’d be driving around town to the different festivities, I decided to be DD that night. I attended both birthdays and had a sober blast. I attended one friend’s dinner and joined the other friend’s celebrations at a bar afterwards. I was chatting, laughing, having a great time and not really interested in flirting with any dudes feeling like I had had plenty of that the night before. When I least expect it, this guy comes up to me and asks me to dance. We ended up not really dancing but rather chatting the whole time. Let’s call him: Mr. Pizza. and here’s a really brief description: He’s a cute-indian-young20something-student-whosecutebutawkward-gooddancer-soccerplayer. We chatted the whole night which ended with a super awkward but adorable question “Do you like pizza?” To which I confusedly answered “Um yes”. To which he super super awkwardly replied “I know this place we could go sometime? I like you.”

Recent Exciting Email:

Dear C:

Congratulations from your University! You have graduated!
It is my pleasure to notify you that your degree has been posted to your official university record….

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Harry Potter Series, By: J.K. Rowling

For the last six weeks, I have immersed myself in the world of magic, Hogwarts and wizards. It has been my tiny escape from some recent life challenges and I could not be more grateful to have this little get-away from my real life.

I read this series in middle school and high school and reading them again, for the second time a 7 years later was absolutely enlightening because the layers of meanings hidden in the series starts to emerge. You can take away different lessons at different ages.

Read these books if:

  • you’re any age, any gender, and want to believe in a lil magic

A Tuesday Night Gift

I was exhausted today from a long day and was thinking of not going to my meditation class but I forced myself to go.

And thank goodness I did, because it was EXACTLY what I needed.

Exactly.

There was just so much  energy, so much peace and so much love in that class. It felt so powerful and so peaceful. I was able to leave the class with a big smile and a peaceful state of mind.

At the end of the class, the guru saw that my car was a couple streets away and insisted on walking me to my car. On the way I got to ask him some burning questions that I had. It turned out to be a powerful conversation that just left me feeling truly connected and grateful. 

Grateful for the gift of being able to just be present on this particular Tuesday night, at this particular place with those particular people.

Yesterday for like 60 seconds.

Life made sense. It just all made sense.

It was nice feeling.

My life is starting to have some normalcy again. I feel like I can focus on things that don’t revolve completely around my father’s recovery. I still spend a lot of time with him but it’s becoming more balanced. I think it’s just taken me a long time to come to terms with all the changes in my life.

Some updates:

  • I’m waiting for my school to send me my degree. I am officially a therapist.
  • I’m currently rereading the Harry Potter series and loving every second of it.
  • I’m the most single I’ve been in a long time. I have no interest in anyone right now.
  • I keep daydreaming of taking a trip abroad since I’ve been super bummed about cancelling my Asia trip.
  • I’m planning on attending a meditation class this upcoming week. I miss going so much!

I’m completely unsure what the next upcoming months will bring for me. And this is something totally different for me. But different can be good.